Forget being polite, here's how to really network
Mike Del Ponte
February 12, 2015, 7:30 AM EST
View networking as a philosophy to internalize,
not a skill to practice, says Mike Del Ponte, co-founder of Soma.
The Leadership Insider network is an online community where
the most thoughtful and influential people in business contribute answers to
timely questions about careers and leadership. Today’s answer to the question
“To get ahead in business, is it better to have skills or connections?” is
written by Mike Del Ponte, co-founder of Soma.
Connections — by a land slide. Here’s why.
Most people are lucky if they are considered an “expert” in anything.
Connections, however, allow you to partner with a number of people who are
“experts” in their own respective roles. This yields significantly better
results than depending on your skills alone, no matter how good you are.
But, the power of connections is often least apparent to high achievers. As
an entrepreneur, I became accustomed to doing most jobs myself. Initially, this
starts from necessity. With limited resources, you can’t afford to hire
everyone you need so it’s up to you to put in extra the hours and wear multiple
hats. The problem is that this only works for so long — no one can build a
large and successful company on their own. So, when I hear people say ‘if you
want to do something right, do it yourself,’ I cant help but disagree. Not only
do you inevitably hit a ceiling at which you can’t produce sufficient results,
you also neglect the talent that is all around you. That’s why great leaders
focus on building extraordinary teams. And not only collecting extraordinary
people, but also training them to get greater results than even they believed
possible. That’s the power of collaboration.
Now, you might argue that in order to accumulate a lot of connections, the
skill of networking must be mastered. While there is some truth in this, I
prefer to view networking as a philosophy to internalize, not a skill to
practice. Here are three of the most important lessons I have learned while
building my own network:
It’s about them, not you. If you want to have meaningful
relationships and valuable business connections, focus on other people. Be
genuinely interested in them. Celebrate their successes. Help them overcome
challenges. Put others first and they will be there for you when you need help.
Stand out. Rather than practicing elevator pitches and
collecting business cards, focus on doing something that will change the world.
Be unique — people will naturally gravitate.
Be vulnerable. In our masculine-centered business world,
many people are afraid to talk about anything that doesn’t make them look good.
This is a perfect formula for anyone who wants shallow relationships. If you
want to go deep, open up. Ask important questions that you really care about.
Polite cocktail party conversation is boring, anyway.
Read all answers to the Leadership Insider question: To get ahead in
business, is it better to have skills or connections?
Why networking means zilch if you don’t know yourself
by David Reese, Vice President of people and culture at Medallia.
Why talent will only take you so far in business by Derek
Lidow, author of “Startup Leadership: How Savvy Entrepreneurs Turn Their Ideas
Into Successful Enterprises.”
To get ahead in business, why connections matter by
Christine M. Aylward, Managing Director of Foresite Capital Management
